Why I never stick to anything....

Well recently I decided to drink my way through my cocktail book. This came to a halt quickly as I quit my cushy salaried job and became poor again. Now I have no money to buy alcohol that I am not sure I'll like. Maybe someday I'll get back on the creative drinking train. It is a fun idea. But like I said... I am poor again. Lame.

In all honesty the thing that stops me the most from doing things is not instantly having all the supplies. I lose momentum in the time it takes me to gather everything. Its like "Oh I need a dremel for this but its 2am..." so you wait till the next day and have work, finally you get a dremel... By that time my brain is already on to about twenty new ideas. Sadly. What I'm saying is we need 24 hour craft and hardware stores. Also I need a bigger house. I think my productivity would greatly increase if I had a bigger workspace. And if my cats paws were tied behind her back. She will seriously play with ANYTHING you put in front of her. Or even if you put it somewhere else she WILL find it.

I am also really bad at sticking to resolutions like "eat better and get into shape"... I try all the time... but its always up and down. One week I get to tons of ballet classes and the gym. The next week I eat cheeseburgers and play video games ALL the time. There needs to be some balance. I just like food too much. Well that is one excuse. But I also like working out and yet I don't go. Now if I could teleport it would be all gravy. I would be at the gym all the time. Also I could easily get to the store to buy healthy food.

And if I could time travel I could easily get a dremel at 2am.

Perfect.

Random Writings

I was bored...

I think the reason I like writing is because I suck at talking. And don’t tell me I don’t because I seriously do. I can’t tell a story for the life of me, nor anything with a point to it. I tend to talk in mumbo-jumbo word salad. Expressing things this way is extremely frustrating…especially when you can’t find words and make up your own phrases as substitutes. You just can’t trust people to know what you mean by comparing a sousaphone to a “cracked out crayfish with a banana in its ear”. I feel in general my thoughts are much more organized in writing and I am much better at finding words through my fingers than my mouth. And even if is not that much better, writing generally affords you time to tweak it. Regardless, my writing is still quirky and probably misleadingly interesting for a moment until you realize that there will not actually be bagels at the end of it.

Because I feel like it… lets talk about things I hate. No, sorry, I hate way too much stuff. Trying to be positive here… lets talk about things I enjoy or would enjoy if they happened. I realize this is less interesting for you, but it is infinitely much better for my brain.

Firstly, a new one, I enjoy the show “Gossip Girl”. I think it may be replacing “Sex and the City” as my favorite show. I love “SATC” but “Gossip Girl” is just so much more relevant to my age and problems. And the fashion is divine and much more accessible. And I have a girl crush on Blake Lively, her nose makes me feel better about mine. Also, Penn Badgely is cute, if overly troubled by trivial things and a penchant to act retarded and break up with Serena all the freaking time. Also I love Chuck Bass’ character, very good…tons of development happening, juicy. Keep in mind I am behind by about a season…but please? What happened to the colleges? In the beginning of the show, Dan wants to go to Dartmouth, Serena to Brown, Blair is obviously Yale, Nate is the black sheep who wants USC, and yada yada yada. But now they’re ALL freaking going to Yale. Or not, but that’s the only school mentioned (I know that there was some plot point about Dan and Dartmouth’s lit program really being Yale, but that’s just stupid needless details). And I’m on season 2, but I was impatient and read all the synopsis’s and find out everyone goes to NYU!!!! Hello?! I mean I know it was just so all the characters could stick around and the show could go on, but really? Couldn’t you have thought about that from the start? However I enjoy it regardless and I trust that eventually Dan and Serena will figure it out. Also, crack equals not a good idea.

Secondly, something I would enjoy. Stuffed animals. Call me silly, but I love my stuffed animals. Yes I still sleep with them. They’re always there for me and never criticize. A very nice present would be a nice stuffed animal, it seems cheesy but if it’s a nice one and not one of those ones that is mass produced for Valentine’s Day it really wouldn’t be. I guess that’s something you never think of buying for a twenty-three year old. But in elf years I’m like 10, so it totally makes sense.

Third, I enjoy this Midnight Pomegranate candle from Bath and Body Works. It’s the second one I’ve been through…the scent is nice although not easily definable, like most candles. But sometimes you just like things without being able to quantify it and just roll with it. That’s what that candle is like.
More about why I like writing. Because I suck at talking. Oooops, I think I may have already told you that. I would LOVE to be someone who is a great communicator and always honest and truthful about how I feel. However, I do realize that I am not this. Even if I tried to express how I feel all the time people would probably just wonder why the gremlin was speaking out of turn. It just comes out sort of convoluted and gobbledy-gooky. If you were just thinking “Hey I bet spell check doesn’t like that word”, well you’d be right. Ok, moving on past the gorilla cage….

Number four, stickers. I love stickers. I put them on my pens for work.... I save them... I put them on my laptop.... I especially have a lot of Batman stickers. One of my laptops has a Batman sticker on the cover and a Batman screen saver... So when I pull the laptop out (it's name is "The Beast" by the way) I yell "Batman!!!" and then when I open the cover I yell "Batman!!!" and when I close the cover I ye.... Yeah, this WILL go on all day.

Fifth, I love Batman. I enjoy Batman. I have Batman mugs, Batman stickers, Batman note pads, Batman sheets, comforter, stickers, belaying action figure, etc. All my computers have Batman screen savers except my net book "The Beastling" which has the animated X-Men because they're cool too. "The Beast" and "The Beastling" both have these names because they are a pain in the ass and I have had to wipe both of their hard drives. Wiping hard drives is not as hard as waiting for the week of updates afterwards.

So there, I like Batman.

A ridiculous scene work up I never used...

I wrote this for an acting class recently... It was the scenario for a very simple dialogue... I tried to make the most ridiculous choices possible for my back story. I got sick that day of class and never got to use it.

Girlfriends

Kara and Lisa are bffs. They grew up together, went to school together, they now both work in the fashion industry as buyers but for rival companies. But they NEVER go a day without talking.

Today is Saturday around 10am… They have a Saturday ritual of ALWAYS meeting for coffee at their favorite Starbucks in the Marina near their apartments. They don’t even have to call or text to confirm…NOTHING gets in the way of Saturday coffee (except for maybe a really hot guy or a trip to France…but these are acceptable reasons).

Thursday night the girls went out to a super hot club in the city and they were partying with all the cool people and they spotted one of the guys from their favorite show; Entourage. Lisa caught the eye of Kevin who plays Johnny Chase and is now dancing with him and Kara is doing her best to twitter this on her iPhone but some greasy looking dude keeps bumping into her. Kara gets really pissed off at this guy and moves down the bar further, but she loses sight of Lisa. When she comes back she trips and breaks her heel (oh no!) and still can’t find Lisa. She tries texting her but has no luck… Because they are bffs after all, she hangs around for awhile and hobbles to the bathroom a few times to look for Lisa. She finally gives up…having seen neither her friend nor the Entourage star and catches a ride home….

Friday is a rough day, Kara has a ton of appointments to look at clothing for the new season coming up plus a wicked hangover and a sore ankle from her heel incident. She shoots a text to Lisa a few times, but hears nothing… but she doesn’t really worry since she knows Lisa can take care of herself. (One time in high school Lisa gave a guy a concussion with her purse because he was harassing Kara.)

So today, Saturday…. Kara is already settled at the bar counter that looks over the street when Lisa walks in smiles makes her way to the counter and grabs her favorite chai tea latte before joining her…. Their discussion ensues as Kara tries to get the dirt from Lisa on what happened Thursday night….

Lisa is a little bit shy about it, shes never slept with anyone who is a celebrity and she just doesn’t do one night stands….but she knows that’s probably all it is, obviously… But then Johnny called her on Friday and wants to take her out this weekend and has extended his stay in the city just because of her. So she is playing a little coy about the whole thing when Kara starts asking.

Best Intentions

I was thinking today, about my high school yearbook quote. My chosen quote was "Reach for the moon, because if you miss you'll still land on a star". I know, cliche, but a quote I believe in none the less. I think its beautiful and true. If you really reach for it, let go with two hands and reach, you'll get somewhere. Even if you don't become "successful" at least you will have that knowledge that you tried. Now, what I was realizing today, was what a hypocrite I am. I use this quote and never follow though on it. I really never have said "Fuck it", taken that leap of faith, and tried. I guess that is pretty sad. Instead of reaching for the moon all this time I have been reaching for the appetizer plates. Lame. It is 2010, a time for doing and closing your eyes and jumping off the edge of uncertainty and trying a good try before you settle on an eternity of creme brulee.

I often say I don't know what I want. But that is a lie. I do know what I want. I'm just afraid to take it.

Drinking through my cocktail book... Part 1 of many...

As "research" for the bar I will own in the future, I have decided to drink my way through my cocktail book. I figure you might as well try everything once to get an idea of what you like and what doesn't work. And I drink a lot anyways, so its likely I will actually get somewhere with this mission as it only requires me to be more creative with my drinking time. The book I am using is called "The New American Bartender's Handbook". (Yes I know, I could use the black book, but its so cliche.) Since the back of the book breaks everything down by the main spirit used in it I have decided to start with Vodkas. Last night I made the first two drinks a "57 T-Bird" and an "Absolut Hero".

First off was the "Absolut Hero". This is the ingredient line up.

I know, I know, you're thinking "Is that an egg???" Yes it is. The recipe calls for egg white, and I wanted to do it right, so I made one with the egg and one without.

On eggs, from Drink Dogma,

"While the ice comparison is a useful argument, instead of cooling and adding water to cocktails , egg whites act as an emulsifier forging the independent ingredients together. As A Companion for the Young Imbiber explains, when an egg is shaken with a cocktail the proteins become physically agitated and then recollect near air, drastically changing the texture of drinks and creating a foamy layer on top. Alone, this foam would cave quickly, but the presence of citrus juice in many drinks functions as a stabilizer, increasing the longevity of the foam. To get all scientific, the acidity changes the pH of egg whites and promotes the presence of hydrogen ions which makes the egg foam more airy and durable. The same occurs when espresso is shaken with lemon juice, the protein in the espresso is agitated and the citric acid creates a dynamic and flavorful foam."

You can read the rest of this post here.

Here is our finished product.

"Absolut Hero"

1 oz blackcurrant vodka

1 oz lemon vodka
1 oz melon liqeur

2/3 oz fresh lime juice

2/3 oz egg white

soda water

lime wedge to garnish

Mix all but soda in a mixing glass, strain over ice in a highball, top with soda, and garnish.

Tasting Notes- You can definitely tell the interaction of the eggwhite and lime juice. The eggwhite dulled the citrus flavour, causing the black currant to stand out more. The one made without eggwhites had a stronger flavor of citrus. I didn't like the drink that much though. It would definitely be refreshing but the flavor, while sweet, was not overly interesting.

Not really something I would make again or order.

The second drink of the night was a "57 T-Bird". And here are the ingredients...

Again, a little odd... somewhat fruity and then... amaretto?

And the finished product.

"57 T-Bird"

1oz vodka

2/3 oz amaretto

2/3 oz peach schnapps

2/3 oz melon liqeur

1 2/3oz orange juice

Shake all ingredients together and strain over ice into an old fashioned glass.

Tasting Notes- Very sweet. My partner in crime called it "candy". The amaretto makes the drink, balancing out the sweet of the fruit juice and liqeurs with a still sweet yet different flavor.

Definitely one to remake.

On Writing

One of the many things I want to do this year is to write a book. Probably not a story, I don't even know where to start and where to go with stories. I'm thinking something ala David Sedaris...sortof situational and rambly. It's so hard to just start though. Well, its hard to start doing anything. For me anyways. I have ideas, execution fails a lot though. But writing is fun, enjoyable, takes no capital....but fleshing stuff out is a pain, story arcs suck, and its all self motivation. There is nothing and no one to carry you except yourself. Oddly, I find I am too lazy to write sometimes. It's like "oooh I could write lines and lines of detailed observations on cupcakes", but when you get right down to it you just feel like writing "Meh. Cupcakes are nice." How lame is that? It's not like it takes actual effort to write.... Well it does, like brain efforts and time. But it's definitely easier than weight lifting. However googling "Platypi on skateboards" is also easier than writing. This is why I took up blogging...it's an acceptable media for random short writings. (Btw, "googling" is not an acceptable word according to spell check.) (Maybe a chapter of my book will focus on unacceptable spell check words.) But even at blogging I fail. Because there is a sortof time requirement that it be consistant. Really the overall product of writing would be much more impressive for me if I wrote it all and published it at once, ala, a book. Because no one would notice the time gaps. Until, of course, I get a publisher. And then I'm screwed.

In other news...

I have decided to become independently wealthy. Not sure what the game plan is yet, I'll keep you updated.

Changing the turn signal assembly on your car is disappointingly easy. The only way to make it easier is to make a neighborhood kid do it for a popsicle. Trust me, it's not worth paying him more.

Cirque du Soleil is ZOMG FUCKING AMAZING!!!!! Please go. The artistry, creativity, strength, grace, attention to visual and aural details, beauty, performance value has blown EVERYTHING I HAVE EVER SEEN out of the water! Call me and I will talk about it forever.

Ben Folds. I want one.

Why does everyone laugh when I say "I was reading Bartender magazine today..."?

Speaking of bar... I am experimenting for my future bar. Next project is infusing liquors... Vodka is obviously a given... I want to try some random stuff.... Basil, ginger, lavender, roses... Rose tequila sounds good. Now would you use rose hips or rose petals? Also, making homemade syrups.... After that, bathtub gin... Haha jk. Oh yeah...wondering how you make coffee liqeur... I think my mom knows this one. Did you know Corzo tequila is the only tequila that uses the process of sparging? It helps the tequila to breathe.

This week is going to be stupid busy. My brother and his girlfriend are going to be visiting, my mom is going to be visiting, I'm getting my hair done, and etc...

Also my friend Ben is reteaching me to drive a manual... Super excited, but its scary....

Also Patrick will excomunicate me if I don't play more L4D with him.

Shmancy.